How like children we are.
My boy drifts in a world of play. Sun on his face and wild hair. When he’s hungry, he opens his mouth and I fill it. When he’s thirsty, the water is always nearby. I anticipate his needs and plan for them before he feels them.
“Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.” (Matt. 5:5)
This liminal process has been a humbling one. It is not possible to take off old and put on new without becoming painfully aware of my own vulnerability. Like my son, I have so many needs. But, unlike him, I have often questioned how they will be met. He has never worried about the future, about doing without. He has not learned the meaning of doubt. He trusts completely.
I was watching him at dinner the other evening. He didn’t know what I was about to feed him, yet as soon as I lifted the spoon he opened his mouth. He did not just hope to be fed something good, he knew he would be fed something good.
He is dependent on me completely. He runs across the yard with oatmeal on his face and dirt under his nails. Does that concern him? Not in the least. He knows I will make him clean. He isn’t even aware that he can’t do it himself. And the fact that he can’t, his complete vulnerability and trust, make me want to protect and provide for him all the more.
This past month of homecoming has been an uphill climb. We arrived with nothing but suitcases. No car, no furniture, no idea where to start (our story). We have been very much aware of our dependence. Yet our needs have been provided for before we’ve even felt them. A friend offered to let us use their car without us even asking. Some family acquaintance who I’ve never even met gave us a huge flat screen TV and speakers. These are only some of the material things we’ve received. We’ve been welcomed with open arms, literally, and with so many offers of help. On top of all this, God has seen fit to move some of our closest friends from the UAE all the way to the same city as us and at the same time. In fact, they are staying just around the corner. They could add their own list of miraculous provisions as well.
“This is your Father you are dealing with, and he knows better than you what you need.” (Matt. 6:8)
We are dependent on Him completely, even in ways that we can’t see. And like a good father, He sees our vulnerability. If we are made in His image, do our own instincts reflect something of Him? My son’s complete and utter need of me, the fact that he can not protect or provide, is what make me want to. Is the same true of God?
We are in between. We are growing. We are weak, meek, and our need is obvious. Is this why He is taking such care of us?
All we can do is receive with thankful hearts.