This painting reminds of a moment Lisa and I experienced weeks ago. We found ourselves at the end of our rope one evening. Tears were shed. We wondered whether we made a terrible decision moving to the States, leaving everything we knew behind. Without any job leads and guarantee on whether we would survive or not, we felt a deeper level of despair and worry. But a picture came to mind.
I was reminded of every single story in the scriptures. Every character had a story that started with a call into a Greater Unknown. But everyone had their version of forty-years of being stranded in the desert as well. Everyone complained and looked back even though the past was not what they wanted. But when they accepted the call, they all gained something greater.
I told Lisa that I had this picture in my head, which was the painting above. And that it was presenting us with a choice and we had to decide:
We either continue to control our life and play things safe,
or we let go and jump into the abyss with full trust on God.
That evening was a huge turning point. It was also the beginning to some very interesting events that happened that we're still trying to catch our breathes from.
Day 10 process
I enjoyed making this one since it's very similar to the kind of work I've done years ago - water color and ink.
The only difference I did this time was instead of using colors to determine the painting, I started off with pencil.
I never start with pencil. It's like sticking to a script. I hate planning a painting before I painted it because it always felt unnatural to me and didn't end up working out. But I tried it again and I was pleasantly surprised.
If there was one thing the pre-paint penciling helped me with was determining layers and depth. To be a little bit more intentional about where I want to wrap my layers instead of it looking 2D.
One thing that did not work out on this one was water color paint on non-water color paper. I use cheap index papers which is convenient for me to waste ideas on it without feeling precious about it. But It took ages to dry and my 0.05mm Micron pen looked like a fat smudgy 0.5mm.
I can see the things I should've done but I am happy that I enjoyed the process.